Roller Coaster

So...
I always start my thoughts with a lazy "So..."
Or a simple and slow "Then..."
Sometimes I Hide these words...
But they are there.

And I start so fucking slowly,
while my feelings grow and grow.
And they are turning more quick
Bigger,  suffocating...

Sometimes
I have a huge desire to pickup the phone
and then...
I stop my thoughts,
Just for a while,
and I start to breath slowly.

And I think...
Over and over.
About all things.
About me.
About how I feel...

Just wonderer how is gonna be
Up and down...
Faster,  slower...
I'm Breathing and shouting...

No one can hear.
No one realize.
No one cares.

So...
I Start again.